When my wife and I got married in 2020, we were just hoping to have a wedding. With COVID and a short timeline, we ended up dramatically cutting our guest list back and having a micro wedding. Since things were weird with the pandemic, we were just excited to find vendors who were willing to work with us. So when it came to photography, we went with the first photographer we found—an acquaintance with a good portfolio and a growing photography business. However, if I could change one thing about our day, it would be hiring this photographer.
Now when I say this, I want to make one thing clear. We received tons of beautiful portraits, great details, and great family formals, but when it came to the actual story of the wedding day—the candids with family and friends—these images were severely lacking.
The problem with wedding photography
As a wedding photographer myself, I am more picky than most when it comes to photography. That being said, the problems in our wedding gallery had nothing to do with the quality of the photography; rather, it was the content.
The wedding industry is just that—it is an industry. It is meant to sell you something. Now at the risk of sounding like a Christmas movie, the true meaning of weddings has gotten lost in all the stuff.
At their core, weddings are about people. They are a day filled with high emotions. A day where it is acceptable for people to express how they feel about one another. They are filled with excitement, energy, and love.
Now if this is the case, why is this not what you see in all the bridal inspo? Everything is about having it picture-perfect. It’s about the details, the dress, not the people. As a photographer, I feel this tension. There is a huge push to create work that is pretty, but this misses the real beauty of the human experience.
I see this reflected in my wife and my wedding gallery. As I look through our 300 images, at least half of them are portraits and details, making only 150 of the images about the people we celebrated the day with.
Here we are almost 5 years later, and the last thing I care to see in our wedding photos are these types of photos. I would give up all our detail shots just to have more photos of our guests. Since our wedding, some of these folks have passed, and over time, more and more of them will no longer be with us.
The question I should have asked
Photographers love showing off their best shots, but a full gallery reveals the real deal. This lets you see their consistency and storytelling ability throughout an entire event. I really want to stress here—make sure you pay attention to more than just the portraits. Do the photos make you feel like you were at the wedding? As one friend put it, “I know someone is a good photographer if I cry looking at a stranger’s wedding photos.”
Make sure you ask to see at least 3 galleries. Anyone can have 1 good wedding, but creating consistently good work—that takes some serious skill.
For the photographers
Now for the photographers out there, my plea to you is to remember why you are there. Yes, portraits are fun. Yes, the details are beautiful. Yes, if you do these things well, you will get published in magazines. But are you photographing for them or for you? I know I can often get caught up in trying to create award-winning images or something that a magazine will like, but this type of work does not serve my clients. It serves me.
Meaningful doesn’t mean magnificent
As you enter your wedding day and look through all the photographers, keep in mind what the day is about. You are there to marry your best friend and celebrate with your loved ones. This may be the only time all these people are gathered in one room. For some of them, you may never see them again. When my clients end up getting their galleries and share their favorites with me, I find the magnificent photos aren’t often the meaningful ones, and the most meaningful photos are not often very magnificent.
