8 Ways You Can Deepen Your Connection After Marriage
By getting married, many couples decide to pledge their eternal love for each other in the eyes of God and the law. Apart from love, marriage is a way to solidify their commitment to each other, build a future together and also adhere to their values.
That being said, marriage shouldn’t be viewed as a miracle potion that will suddenly transform your relationship. Sure, throwing a wedding and celebrating your love with the world is incredibly fun. But working with each other to keep a marriage alive and healthy takes a lot of work.
In long-term relationships, especially marriages, we fall into this comfort zone and start taking it for granted. If you don’t want to lose the ‘spark’ after getting married, check out these ways to deepen your connection with your partner.
Try to Be a Good Listener
If you’ve been with a person for a long time, it’s easy to tune them out intentionally or not. Being a good listener is essential to showing your partner that you care. So try your best to listen to whatever they are excited or worried about. If someone is sharing something that makes them feel vulnerable, it means that they trust you. You can offer emotional and moral support by lending a listening ear.
Consider Combining Your Surnames
Many people, typically women, tend to take up their husband’s last name after getting married. Apart from following the tradition that they might have been raised with, it is also a way to show their commitment.
If you’re not a traditionalist, you can do what many modern couples are doing- combine your surnames! Famously, actor and director Aaron Taylor-Johnson and Sam Taylor-Johnson combined their surnames. Use a deed poll to apply for a name change.
Plan Weekly Date Nights
Just because you’ve moved on from your dating to being married, doesn’t mean you can’t go out on fun dates. Plan a date night every night to connect with each other. Try not to talk about work, kids, or anything else that you usually talk about.
Catch Up Everyday
Even if you’re in two different cities, take out 10-15 minutes every day to catch-up and ask your partner about their day.
Spend Time with Each Other’s Family
If your spouse is really close with their family, they would appreciate you developing a similar relationship with them. Make an effort to get to know your in-laws. Taylor Swift’s song Peace perfectly captures this in the lyric “Family that I chose, now that I see your brother as my brother”.
Practise Healthy Communication
Listening is part of healthy communication. Another is verbalising your emotions and opinions in a respectful and calm manner. Don’t let minor or major disagreements escalate to full-blown screaming matches. Create a space where you can freely express your feelings.
Show Your Support
Is your spouse planning to quit their job to chase after a creative venture? Yes, this could possibly put a strain on your finances and future plans. But more than anyone, they need YOU to believe in them. Instead of dismissing their ideas without consideration, show your support and have some faith.
Always Be Empathetic
Your partner may go through issues that you can’t completely understand or relate to. You took a vow to be with them for better or for worse. And just like the good days, there will always be difficult times. Being empathetic is crucial to help your partner through a rough patch.
Marriage is a beautiful dance, from the outside it may look effortless, but in reality, it requires constant hard work. Hopefully, the aforementioned ways will help you connect with your spouse on a deeper level and build the foundation for a strong marriage.
